My mom is such a fucking cunt!

Honest to God, I have done my best to be kind and patient but she is such a selfish and manipulative bitch, I have absolutely had it up to here with her today.

The roads were shitty and so by the time I got home it was 8:15 pm.  I got home to 2 emails and a voicemail. Something important, you’re thinking?  No. Nothing fucking important at all. Before I get into this, let me explain that she’s totally paralyzed by an anxiety disorder, which she chooses not to treat. Apparently my dad “doesn’t want her to” go to therapy for it, meaning he’s too cheap to fucking pay for it, but she has her own money and could well afford to go if she wanted to. Secondly there’s the option of anti-anxiety medications, but she doesn’t want to be a “druggie” (because anyone who takes psychiatric medications is the same as a dirty hippie tripping on acid, or getting high on pot, or a raver on Ecstacy, apparently.). So she lied to her family doctor telling him that her anxiety “wasn’t a problem.”  Here are some examples of how her anxiety affects her everyday life (note the high emphasis on what people will think, which was central to us growing up – what will the neighbours think? Don’t say anything!)

  • She won’t pump gas because the car might explode
  • She combs her hair down over her ears because people might think she has big ears (my grandpa apparently gave himself hammertoes by wearing shoes that were too small so people wouldn’t think his feet were big)
  • She won’t ask a waitress for anything in a restaurant, because if she asked the waitress for more salad dressing or whatever, the waitress might think she was a pig
  • When she is backing out of her garage she stomps the brakes to make the car break abruptly, because there might be a little kid hiding behind the tires (despite checking before getting in the car and using the rear view mirror)
  • She doesn’t like wearing clothes that fit because people might see her “rolls” (as opposed to wearing things fitted like sacks)

It goes on and on, but my sister and dad just do this accommodation with her that drives me nuts. Like for example, at the restaurant where she wanted more salad dressing, she told my dad who said “Can we get more salad dressing?” when the waitress came around next. He was having a fucking steak sandwich, there was no “we” needing more salad dressing. And I am not into compensating for her that way. If you choose to have an anxiety disorder and to let it be untreated, then you can take the consequences. Go without salad dressing then. But of course if I actually say what is happening, if I name it, then I get “That’s not very nice!” in this shaming tone of denial.

Anyway, back to today – the first email from Her Highness the Bitch was that she had tried to sign in to her online banking app, that it had asked her a security question because she hadn’t signed in before, she chickened out and “x-ed out” (closed the app) but she heard that if you don’t log out before you close the app, then you’re still logged in and the hackers can get you. Like no, Jesus, she doesn’t even understand anything about computers and what she has is an anxiety problem, not a tech support problem. I’ve sent her the bank’s 100% guarantee, where if you don’t hand out your PIN then they guarantee unauthorized transactions against your account.  Regardless of which, what the fuck does she want me to do? I can’t go back in time and undo when she closed the app. So call the bank if you are worried, and let them laugh at you, fuck.

The voicemail explained how she tried to use BCC by putting Brenda in the To: line and other people in the BCC line, but when she looked at the sent email it showed Brenda’s name, and so it “wasn’t secure”, and what should she do? Now note that she is forwarding fucking jokes. Not sending business-related emails or emails of any importance at all. So who gives a fuck?  She asked how to delete all her Gmails and I tried to explain that you don’t have to, because Gmail has such a large storage capacity, and she said she “didn’t want that on her iPad” (because the hackers might get it, apparently.). Why the hackers would be interested in the email addresses of her church friends she sends jokes to, I have no idea.

So anyway, I emailed saying I’d just gotten home, that the bank issue was fine, that she should read about BCCs on Google because it sounded like it was working fine according to her voicemail. She responded with an email saying “I need tech support!” So I wrote back again, a more angry email, saying that I.JUST GOT HOME and that she should call the bank if she was worried, or maybe go get some anti-anxiety drugs, but that I didn’t have time for this.

I mean, Jesus!  Emails and a voicemail as if holy shit, they couldn’t get on the Internet, or all they got was a command prompt, or something, not “I closed an app without logging out, and sent some jokes with BCC to my friends but I think I did it wrong.”  What a hell of a nerve to act like it’s a fucking emergency.  This is exactly what I was worried about going into the hospital for, that Frantic Anxiety Bitch-Mom would go bananas if she couldn’t get a hold of me.  What a selfish cunt. My sister has the good sense to not have patience for her nonsense, so I’d become de facto tech support, but what she needs is psychiatric support, not tech support. And you know what? If I am successful at committing suicide I bet that bitch will be like “Oh, why didn’t she get help, why didn’t she come to us” when the answer is 1. I did. For years. In every form available to me and 2. Because you’re a useless judgemental bitch.  Now I’ve been home for an hour and I’m still steamed, that fucking cunt.
I just looked up the little train of emails. Worse than I thought. Here is the first one from Anxious Bitch:

What I was trying to say is when Clicked on the link to give my information I should have submitted it instead of closing it and I remembered the guy at the bank said not to close but to log out or it would stay online . If I would have had a way to submit the information it would have had a log out so I was wondering if the information was out there because when I closed it it also closed the bank site which should have been logged out instead but when I closed it everything went off so I screwed up and it wasn’t ok.

So I replied “It’s fine, you worry too much.”
Then I listened to her voicemail and sent this email:

I jjst got home, work is really busy, you are going to have to be more patient (like 5-day turnaround) with your tech support requests. How you explained bcc in your message is exactly how it is supposed to work. Try reading about it on Google. I have to eat supper now, ok, bye.

 She emailed “Are you at work?”

I replied “I just got home!!!”

Literally 3 minutes later she emailed “Need tech support!”

So I responded,

Yah, you will have to wait. I JUST GOT HOME and need to eat and do stuff. Call the bank or go get a prescription for anti-anxiety pills if you need them. Maybe I can call on the weekend.

She responded a minute later,

Is there a problem that I should call the bank?

No. The fucking problem is that you have an anxiety disorder that you won’t treat, and you are so fucking rude and selfish and clueless that you can’t even fucking get it when I spell out that I have been gone for 12 hours and haven’t had supper. Bitch!!!!

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One thought on “My mom is such a fucking cunt!

  1. Ugggghhh! So much relating to this post! My mother doesn’t treat her schizophrenia because what is funner than slinging your own feces at people driving down the highway? She doesn’t take her meds because they are “unhealthy” Do you have any boundaries in place? Sometimes it helps to write it down….uh oh, there’s that pesky advice giving…..I have to have that looked at 😉

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