When will everyone else be happy?

It seems someone with depression can’t do enough to please everyone else.  Surely if we took more drugs, did more therapy, read more books, got more exercise, we would feel better… and if we don’t, we can suffer silently, sacrificially, for everyone else’s comfort.



Doug Stanhope keeps ringing true

“Life is like a movie, if you’ve sat through more than half of it and it’s sucked every second so far, it probably isn’t going to get great right at the end and make it all worthwhile. None should blame you for walking out early.”
― Doug Stanhope




Feeling crazy weird with postdrome

I was beyond exhausted on Friday.  I felt like I could have literally fallen asleep at work. I went home and straight to sleep, as in KO’ed by 5 pm, then slept until 10 Saturday morning.

So that is 17 hours there. I still felt exhausted but managed one load of laundry at the end of the night because I had literally no clean underwear.

I woke up today, Sunday, at 4:30 in the afternoon.  There’s an empty foil  blister pack of a migraine drug in bed with me, so I assume I woke up and took it.

My head doesn’t hurt anymore, but I feel totally and completely out of it.

I don’t even know how to describe this state of confused exhaustion.  Am I experiencing depersonalization, or derealization, or disorientation? Is there nothing to do but wait for it to go away?